Author’s note: you should probably read this first. its the original post, which delineates aspects of my psyche.
http://esoteric_avenue.blogspot.com/2004/09/finally.html#comments

And yet another friendship built upon grandiose promises and false guarantees. This was more stupendous than usual; an edifice of fabrication and mendacity. An ad hoc construction predicated upon quintessential platonic love. It was so magnificent that all stood in awe of its sanctity, its bond which no storm could break, and no human hand smite.

Alas, it all collapsed in a single thud.

I took a walk down memory lane today. The usual salutary climate was gone; it was a crepuscular, sepulchral place, filled with shadows and dissembled musculature. The untainted laughter of children and excited palpitations of the body were replaced by a silence that was as lachrymose as it was deafening. I had never been to this place alone. The edifice and its unparalleled surroundings were subsumed into the dark, gloomy Execration. For the uninitiated, Execration is “a vengeful, sinuous body of water on the outskirts of my psyche. It is black and bottomless, and all the maps stop there. Maritime monstrosities abound, blood is as abundant as water, but it is so dark that one is blind. It is a cloud of mayhem and murder. All the abominations you can imagine, they're all there, inside the metaphor.”

I clawed my way out of the cursed liquid. Panting and struggling for life on my hands and knees, I landed on the Void. Straining my ears, I could still hear the obstreperous, recalcitrant waves refusing to give in to the deadening silence.
After wading out, i shook the inky black water out of my hair like a dog.

And we are all dogs.